Persuasive Principle #3: Law of Esteem

          In Maximum Influence, author Kurt W. Mortensen states, “The Law of Esteem identifies that all humans need and want praise, recognition, and acceptance” (Mortensen 70). I feel that this law suggests that the more you offer praise and make someone feel valued, the more persuasive you will be. I use the Law of Esteem daily, but not with the intention to persuade people. Every day I try to praise people sincerely whether it is my family, friends, or strangers. I always tell my mom that the dinner she cooks is amazing because she was given cooking lessons from the Gods. I just want to let my mom know that I greatly appreciate the effort she puts into every meal. In school I will praise my fellow classmates (who I am in a group with) that their ideas are great to show I appreciate their contributions. I plan on using praise as a persuasive technique to see if I can be successful with such an intention in mind. Hopefully I will come to understand what it takes to use this law effectively, so I can use it effectively as I embark on my career aspirations.

            An example of the Law of Esteem in action is in a boss and assistant relationship. Consider a situation in which the assistant schedules all of the boss’ meetings, acquires new clients, and even picks up lunch. In a sense, the assistant does all of the little things which contribute to the boss’ big success. If the boss doesn’t praise and acknowledge the assistant’s hard work, he may begin to feel unappreciated. The assistant may be far less likely to want to do things for the boss because he feels like he has to; it is only part of the job. If the assistant doesn’t like the work, the quality of it may be less than adequate. As a result, the boss’ success may diminish because he didn’t give the praise to the assistant that would motivate him to want to help the boss. In order to use this law in a more successful manner, this boss should offer praise where it is needed and deserved. As a result, the assistant will be persuaded to want to do quality work because he knows it won’t go unappreciated.

            I use the Law of Esteem as much as I can when it comes to my sister and her academics. That is, I always offer praise to her when she gets good grades to let her know that good  things come from good grades. My goal is to persuade her to continue to do well in school, while also reminding her to stay humble and put in the effort that is necessary to succeed. Since she never performs poorly in school, I try to let her know that she isn’t perfect without sending a negative message to her. I want to keep her ego in check (not to high or low) so she can continue to succeed in school, like she is, with flying colors.

            My final example is centered around the concept of ingratiation. According to Kurt W. Mortensen, “Ingratiation is gaining favor by means of a deliberate effort, such as compliments, flattery, and agreeableness” (Mortensen 75). Many people may refer to this as sucking up or brown-nosing, but it works because it increases likability and promotes an increase in self-esteem. Take for example if a boss was about to chose between two of his workers for a promotion. Both workers are equal in their ability to do their jobs, and they both want that promotion. While one worker continues to do his job in an exemplary manner, the other worker takes things a step further by utilizing the concept of ingratiation. He constantly praises his boss’ hard work, compliments his outfit daily, and always sides with the boss. In addition, he uses the power of apology to remind his boss that he is in power and that the worker is below him. In the end, the ingratiator got the promotion by persuading his boss through praise, compliments, and boosting his self-esteem (Mortensen 75-76). Kurt W. Mortensen says it best that, “Our esteem is so starved that we accept any flattery or praise we can get” (Mortensen 75).

Persuasive Principle #2: Law of Involvement

          As stated by Kurt W. Mortensen in Maximum Influence, “The Law of Involvement suggests that the more you engage someone’s five senses, involve them mentally and physically, and create the right atmosphere for persuasion, the more effective and persuasive you’ll be” (Mortensen 44). In other words, the more you engage someone’s five senses and encourage participation the more successful your persuasive attempts will be. I don’t use the Law of Involvement in my everyday life, and I find it hard to remember I time in which I have ever used it. This may be due to the fact that I have never worked as a salesman, or have had an occupation which requires such skills. It isn’t necessary for me to use this law in my life right now, but I know that will change as I get into my career because so many careers require such persuasive skills. So as the semester progresses I want to make an effort to find ways in which I can practice using the Law of Involvement, whether it is with my family or complete strangers. Putting the effort in now to get familiar with this law will allow me to thoroughly develop my ability to use it as my life progresses. Although I haven’t used it, I have countless memories in which the Law of Involvement has been used on me.

            Movie sequels are a great example of how the Law of Involvement can be successful. Most movies always end at clever places that make you want to know what happens. That is, the movies want to leave the ending open ended so the viewers don’t know the whole story. Films of the 21^st century have made it a habit of teasing viewers with post credit scenes of what is to come in the next movie. This makes the viewers want to know what happens next, so they are persuaded to go and see the movie’s sequel to know what happens next. This is an example of the Zeignarik effect, which is “the tendency we have to remember uncompleted thoughts, ideas, or tasks more than completed ones” (Mortensen 63). In other words, people can’t stand not knowing the end of stories and they will remember uncompleted stories more than completed ones. This example has proven to be successful because I already know ahead of time what movies coming out in the future that I will spend my money on.

             My second example of the Law of Involvement is how pet stores encourage hands-on experiences. I have fallen victim to pet stores countless times in my life because they are a very powerful foe in regards to persuasion. One day my mother and I went to the Humane Society to look into buying a kitten, but we weren’t concrete on the matter. As we entered the building I saw the kitten through a glass wall, sleeping like an angel in her bed. At that moment I didn’t care what we had to do to get her because she was going home with me. To get me even more solidified on the matter, an employee encouraged my mother and I to go into her room and get to know her a bit. As I walked through the door she looked at me with her little eyes and stretched. I picked her up and she cuddled herself into my arms, at which point I heard nothing my mother or the employee had said from there on out. The love was completely unconditional and I became instantly attached to her, which made it impossible to say no to the employee. In the end we adopted the kitten because we fell in love with her instantly. Even though we probably would have adopted her without holding her, it made it absolutely impossible to say no when we had the hands-on experience. The Humane Society was extremely successful in their persuasion attempt because they showed us that we needed the kitten and that we have been missing out on her love, all through the Law of Involvement (Mortensen 55).

            My final example which demonstrates successful usage of the Law of Involvement is State Farm’s “Discount Double Check” commercials. I feel that they are successful because State Farm does an exemplary job of telling mesmerizing stories, using appropriate humor, and creating mental involvement. Their commercials tell stories which simplify concepts that the audience can understand, which help them arrive to their own conclusions by themselves. In other words, people accept the answers a story gives more than if they were to be provided the answers directly by someone; we like finding the answers on our own. Their hilarious stories give people the room to think and persuade themselves without having to throw statistics and facts at the audience (Mortensen 61-62). They are successful in their attempt to persuade the audience because whenever someone mentions State Farm I unconsciously and automatically think of their comical commercials. I have positive associations with State Farm, which contributes to persuading me to be more likely to get State Farm Insurance rather than another insurance company.

Persuasive Principle #1: Law of Connectivity

            According to Kurt W. Mortensen, author of Maximum Influence, “The Law of Connectivity states that the more someone feels connected to, liked by, or attracted to you, the more persuasive you become” (Mortensen 28). I feel that the Law of Connectivity suggests that the more someone likes you and the more common ground you have, the more persuasive you’ll become. Out of all the persuasive principles we have talked about thus far, I use the Law of Connectivity the most. This is because using manners and giving genuine compliments can go a long way, especially when it comes to persuasion. If you give someone an honest compliment and then they feel good about themselves, they will more than likely perceive you in a positive manner. As a result of establishing such a bond, it will be easier to persuade that person because they will trust you. Although I use this principle every day, I don’t have persuasive intentions in mind. I think it is important to be respectful to others and have a positive impact on people’s lives. This is apparent when I compliment someone’s outfit, hold doors open for people, or simply smile and say hello. It has been effective because people seem to smile and are happy as a result. Throughout this semester and beyond I will try to expand my use of this principle and test the ability I have to use it. By using it in different situations with persuasive intentions in mind I will be able to learn and improve my persuasive skills.

            One example where I have used the Law of Connectivity is whenever I work at my country club. I work as a caddie and every time I go out to the golf course I am assigned to a country club member. My responsibilities are simple, for I am to carry the member’s golf clubs and tend other miscellaneous things. In order to build a connection with a member I’ve never met before, I compliment them on their golf game no matter how good or bad they actually are. I also ask a lot of questions to gain common ground, which helps me build a bond with the member. If I’m successful with my tactics, I will have persuaded the member that I am an exceptional caddie, and hopefully they’ll give me a larger tip at the end of the day. To make things better, hopefully they will request me in the future as a caddie because of their positive associations about me.

          Marvel’s Captain America: The First Avenger is another example where the Law of Connectivity is present. In the movie, the main character Steve Rogers was initially very skinny, small, and weak. No women ever saw him for more than his physical appearance and never paid attention to the extraordinary heart he had. Guys would beat him up constantly due to Steve’s lack of physical attributes. But one day Steve Rogers underwent an experiment that turned him into the legendary Captain America. His good looks and unmatched strength changed people’s perceptions of him; now he was perfect and could do nothing wrong. Women wanted him now even though the only thing that changed was his body. This is a prime example of the Halo effect, which states that “attraction operates by making one of your positive characteristics affect other people’s overall perception of you” (Mortensen 28). As a result of Steve’s transformation into Captain America people automatically associated traits of kindness, trust, and intelligence with his attractiveness (Mortensen 28). If the experiment’s goal was to persuade people that Steve Rogers was a perfect person in an imperfect world, it was beyond successful.

            My last example that presents a situation in which the Law of Connectivity was not successful was when I met one of my dad’s co-workers. Since he was a business man it was appropriate that we shook hands upon our introduction. As I firmly gripped his hand, his hand only dangled in the grasp of mine. It felt extremely uncomfortable and I unconsciously associated distrust with him immediately. As Kurt W. Mortensen explains that a handshake can make or break a first impression, this one certainly damaged my first impression of this co-worker (Mortensen 38). It was unfortunate because I felt that his handshake communicated weakness and incompetence. No matter what he did after that it would be hard for me to be persuaded by him if I was an actual businessman. In order to be successful in persuading me, I felt that his handshake should have been firm because it would have suggested that he was strong, competent, and knowledgeable.